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Writing in any capacity takes immense amounts of time and care; so does being a parent. To be both requires particular patience, planning and heart, balancing the time it takes for two different loves in one’s life. Pen Parentis, a literary collective located in FiDi, provides resources to this particular sect of creatives who practice their art under a unique set of circumstances. In a city known for being one the world’s largest incubators for writing and publishing, it can seem overwhelming to find creative platforms. The community offers help in many different manifestations; from salons to fellowships to a like-minded community that helps inspire and empower its members. Since becoming a federally recognized nonprofit in 2013, the group has continued to grow; incorporating bigger names and a larger following into their programming each year. We had the opportunity to learn more about the nonprofit from founder and director Milda De Voe, including how it has grown and what they have in store for the future.
What are some of the resources Pen Parentis offers to its members/ the community?
In addition to the free salons in both NYC and Los Angeles, which are open to anyone 21+ who loves books, we also run an annual Writing Fellowship for New Parents, a mentorship program called the Pen Parentis Cycle of Support, a Pen Parentis Research Project which will culminate in a data-driven book of best practices of writers who are also parents and several online forums, including a secret Facebook group where writers who are parents can discuss issues relevant to their situations, as well as offer guidance and job or publishing opportunities to other members of the group. In the past we have aided local nonprofits and corporations with finding authors for their events and we have also offered book clubs through the 92/Y for writers who are also parents. Paid members additionally enjoy the opportunity of becoming Pen Parentis Mentors, and we publicly celebrate their accomplishments and help them promote new works on social media.
What are some unique attributes of authors who are also parents?
All authors who are parents are as unique as their writing. That said, there are some particular issues which we see over and over as issues that, if not addressed, can potentially derail a creative career. Those issues are 1) identity 2) time and 3) money. The latter two are fairly obvious—the more people you have to support or care for with your time and money, the more difficult it becomes to carve out time for writing—and of course when kids are involved the pressure to make money and the guilt of taking any time away from family can be crippling to your creativity. Both Parenting and Writing have been called 24/7 jobs. Hard to balance this sort of an equation. As for identity, it is a constant struggle—particularly as social media starts assimilating all of our online content into one place without our consent. So much of book sales have to do with branding and image—it’s hard to manage when you are trying to maintain privacy for your children as well as cultivate a public image for your fans.
On the positive side, authors who are also parents discover themselves firmly planted in the history of humanity. They have a complete sense of a continuing timeline in which they are simultaneously son/daughter and father/mother and it opens them to being more understanding of both parents and children as nuanced fictional characters. You learn something about being human by having children, and it is reflected quite strongly in your writing…providing you can find the time/energy/money to be able to continue to write!
Can you tell us about some of the members/ authors that you have worked with in the past?
There are so many it is hard to narrow them down! But some that I have found particularly inspiring have been Darin Strauss, who has read several times for us and sits on our advisory board. He won the National Book Award for his memoir, and was so open during his reading about how having children made him want to come to truthful terms with his own life and therefore he was willing to write this memoir he had shied from for years. Austin Ratner was another phenomenal writer/reader. His first reading with us, he told us how hard it had been to get his book published (it came out from a very small independent press) – he had been so desperate to support his family and asked us all to buy the book so he did not feel like a fool for giving up a career in medicine to become a writer. It got a big laugh—he came back for his second reading having just won a 100,000 literary prize for the very same novel! Victor LaValle and Emily Raboteau read on the same night their profile came out on the cover of Poets&Writers magazine—Emily being pregnant with their second child on the eve of Valentine’s Day. They were beautifully honest about how much they each have to sacrifice in a marriage where both parents are writers—but Emily has now won the American Book Award and Victor’s novel was a New York Times Best Book of the Year. The stories go on and on: Lev Grossman, Jennifer Egan, David Gilbert, Arthur Phillips, Tina Chang, Kelly Link. It’s like a who’s who of fantastic writers.
How has being located in downtown New York informed the group’s direction and growth?
In 2009 when we were just getting started, the Financial District still seemed post 9-11 bleak—many banks and insurance companies had moved to midtown or out of town, restaurants were hurting, we threw ourselves into rebuilding and renewing (remember that old LMDC catchphrase?) and all seemed to be well with the revitalization of Peck Slip and the opening of Spruce Street School. Everything seemed stable and even trending upwards, but then just a few years later, Sandy hit and wiped out a lot of the work downtowners had done to rebuild. We felt we were part of a general struggle—birthing pains if you will—to transition FiDi into NYC’s newest residential neighborhood. Pen Parentis firmly believes in the strength of this neighborhood and we are proud to make downtown our home. We fought hard to keep our Salons downtown despite having our first hosts abruptly close the restaurant where we initially had our home for economic reasons. We had some midtown offers at hotels that had lovely book-themed decor and we considered strongly whether we should move, but our hearts are here, in the Financial District. Quite simply, there isn’t anything else like us down here. We want our Salons to be upscale but affordable. We want our authors to be valued as people not as book-selling commodities. We are thrilled to have partnered with Andaz Wall Street, who have been hosting our Salons since 2014. They provide gorgeous event space as well as refreshments for the audience. We could not ask for a stronger partnership between the Arts and Business: we hope the downtown community enjoys these free events and takes advantage of the hospitality their Andaz offers. Culture is so important to shaping a neighborhood. The Financial District is developing into a beautiful blend of tourism and residential – I read somewhere that more than two thousand new hotel rooms were opening Downtown, as well as 3,000 residential units,Conde Nast just moved i,n and we are eagerly looking forward to McNally Jackson opening their store at the Seaport. I just hope that we can get the word out to all of them—tourists, residents, office workers, and bookstore patrons—that we are here, we are open to the public, and we would love to introduce them to a few great writers and hear their voices added to our lively monthly discussions. We all especially looking forward to local restaurants staying open later so that our monthly audiences can spill over into late-night discussions! We are proud to host our Salons in an area of NYC that is underserved in literary events, and look forward to growing along with our fantastic neighborhood.
Is there any news or upcoming events regarding Pen Parentis that people can look forward to?
In addition to our Writing Fellowship for New Parents which opens for entries on March 1, this coming Tuesday February 9 at Andaz Wall Street we present FAME & FORTUNE with talks and readings from Nanny Diaries authors Nicola Kraus and Emma McLaughlin, beauty editor Tia Williams and publisher Jonathan Galassi, and on March 10th, we will have Great New Writers with Lauren Acampora who wrote a story collection chosen as one of the best books of the year by Amazon, Rumaan Alam whose first novel will be out in Spring 2016, and Helen Phillips, whose first novel was a New York Times Notable book of 2015. You can always check up on current events on our website.
-by Johanna Silver
